There is a reason we say that change is permanent because if it is not, then life today, will not be possible. Everything that exists in this world is because of change and more importantly because it adapted to change. When alterations happen slowly, we get a grip on them much easier and adjust accordingly. But when all of a sudden, a substantial change occurs in our lives, it creates turmoil with our emotions.
Let’s take an example, a student who was on leave for a long time due to some health issues finally goes to school one day. And that day teacher announces surprise test. First, he gets shocked but then he explains his situation to the teacher. She tells him test is mandatory. This makes him very angry and he gives the test with a foul mood, thus scoring much lower than his capability.
Situations like this occur all the time. Whenever a sudden change comes in our life, emotions like shock, denial, excitement, anger, even stress, grief, and depression come with it.
A good change like suddenly getting a job call from a big company brings out shock along with disbelief (what we mean when we say ‘pinch-me!’). Even there, is a stage of pessimism, where we try to find a fault in that event. But ultimately, they lead to elation and happiness afterward. This is called ‘Positive change cycle’ by Psychologists Don Kelley and Daryl Conner.
But those sudden changes which come in the form of bad news, give rise to feelings which are quite unpleasant. In fact, most of the changes that disturb our mundane life, are perceived by us as bad news. We get stressed and anxious at times of urgency. And when we feel that things are not coming in our favour, we get depressed. Rather than accepting the change, we try to find a way out of it. And when there is no way out, we agonize over that. Grieving, resisting, complaining, such emotional reactions are harmful to our mental and emotional well-being.
Avoiding change is not a solution. Neither is crying over it. For getting over sudden changes, acceptance is the key. We have to accept the fact that changes are inevitable. Whether we want it or not, the situation has changed and the only way to deal with it is to adjust according to it. Had the student in example given above tried coping with the situation with a positive attitude, the result would have been definitely better.
Therefore, whenever a sudden change comes in your life, consider it with a positive outlook and control your emotions. Convince your mind that it is for your progress it is happening and if nothing, it will give you a different experience. That thing might look confusing right now but eventually will connect and lead to a bigger picture. Afterall life gets better by changes. As life coach Robin Sharma said rightly, “Change is hard at first, messy in the middle and gorgeous at the end.”