Self-care is an act where you need courage, motivation and support from your own self. You gotta kill the demons in your head by yourself because when you are providing ‘self’ some other being’s presence won’t be able to make it work. Your friends and family members could try to be supportive and all the more motivating but if ‘you’ don’t want it to work, to make a change in your own self then it will never be worth the efforts.
I’d like to ask you to plot a simple question in front of yourself: Are you lovable? Do you think you deserve love? Did you feel that knot rising through your throat? Did you feel that slight tinge of suspicion and doubt? What about that churning empty feeling in your stomach?
Most of us are always surrounded by people we love and still depression, anxiety and other mental/emotional health issues pave their way into this mind of ours. The main problem is that we don’t feel lovable enough. We have this sense of guilt arising that we have done something wrong so we don’t deserve to be loved.
While encountering friends such questions often turn up and I myself feel amused when once in a while someone would say that Yes! I am loved. You feel so complete and motivated once you encounter such a being yet for ‘being’ such a being you got to aim towards self-care.
Self-care is a beautiful exercise where you nourish yourself with love and care from your inner self. It is about guilt free and doubt free moments where you love yourself. Where you don’t have to think that your one act of enjoyment might hurt others: because it won’t. Where you don’t have to ask yourself a thousand times to stay shut so that you don’t cause other people distress by talking about your problems.
Self-care helps you manage stress and pressure. Achieving it would need efforts from your inner-self so that you push yourself enough that doubt doesn’t get in the way.
Some self-care tips are as-
1 Know. Love. Give- First step towards self-care demands knowing yourself, loving whoever you are and giving yourself the time and support you need from your psyche. Never downplay the power of being able to give what you need. You know you love talking to a particular friend about your problems yet you feel you are a burden to them? Give your mind the freedom to act out and reach for support when it needs so.
2. Take Your Time- You are coming back from college and all you want is a good half an hour music session so as to relax yourself but then you think of the pending assignment and get to work. Your mind ‘needs’ the pause. It needs to break the day into various parts so as to work efficiently. If you push yourself to do those machined tasks everyday will you be looking forward to the next day with hope and excitement? Would you love the life you live enough?
3. Indulge In What Brings You Comfort/Happiness- What good is it to cover up two-week worth work in three days and not being able to use the money you saved for playing that much awaited video game series you adore? Does the comparison sound absurd? It probably does but you love it and you are just not spending enough time on it and for what reason? Because you are busy with the work you are supposed to submit one month later? Every person is different and so are their needs and ideas of comfort. One might like walking along the lake and the other might find comfort in their car going down the road only they are aware of. Do whatever gives you comfort, whatever provides you with happiness.
4. Rest Well. Eat Well- Extreme amount of working hours just to prove to yourself that you are doing well. Skipping rest so as to keep everyone happy around you. Such steps might be misinterpreted as hard-working, determinant and kind but what you are actually doing is harming yourself. When you care about yourself you make sure that your basic needs are promptly fulfilled. Resting and eating well are one of those most essential needs. Taking a much needed break is not being selfish, it is being self-considerate enough when you know you are running yourself out. Eating the same packed food every day so as to save money. Is it worth the harm? A home cooked meal or a proper dinner at ten rather than eating fridge resting food somewhere in a dark dining room all alone at one in the morning. Do you think your choice is right? 5. Nourish Yourself- Nourishing yourself inside out is the thing you need to do. Read the book you love. Indulge in your favorite ice cream. Nourish yourself spiritually, emotionally and physically. Take up a meditation routine and train your spiritual self. Talk to your loved ones about the problems you face. Do exercise, eat healthy. All in all do what would give you relief and nourish your soul.
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