It doesn’t seem very long a time when the only jobs we were expected to do entailed playing, eating, pooping and well, existing. School life, looks blissful when you look back at it, doesn’t it?When Problems back then presented themselves as who would accompany the birthday girl/boy to all the teachers or whose turn would it be to bring the ball next. When misunderstandings could sustain no longer than a day and when it wouldn’t require anything more than a toffee in papa’s pocket to bring a wide grin on our faces.
While we all vividly reminisce the simpler and the innocent times, we all have come to terms with the fact that time has changed. And so have we. We attribute it to the chase of acquiring skill, knowledge and success that has led us to become what we are today. So while we are talking about it, let’s take a moment and think about what we are today, and most importantly, who we are today.
Pondering? It is funny how the race of making to the top has left us prepared and equipped to conquer everything except for answering some basic trivial questions.
The time taken to contemplate over those questions bears testimony to the fact that there are issues that were overlooked by us at some point of our lives when we could have paid more attention to them. Such unresolved conflicts, most of us would agree, presented themselves first to when we were in school. It is quite understandable that we chose to leave the issues unsolved then because coping up with constantly changing demands and new responsibilities left us with no time to breathe, let alone seek help.
However, let us be wise to understand that it will be really unwise if things are not set right. Let us be sensible to understand that it is never too late to redefine our perception about our self. Because the thing is, that it is our life we are talking about. And I am sure, that while we all want to be super successful one day with our desired kind of house and car waiting for us to unlock, we surely want to be happy to enjoy all of that.
Following are some of the stressors that people usually meet during their lives at school. An attempt has been made to offer solutions to cope up with each of the stressor that is hoped to relate not only with those who have been through all this but also those who are currently finding themselves struggling with these.
1) Body Image related issues
Our identity of self revolves majorly around our body. Around how we look and how we actually are. Both the ideas are given to us, the former by society and the latter by nature. Still we tend to accord the societal view, most of our attention. Why? Because we are considered as inherently flawed and in need of fixing if don’t suit society’s standards. But let it not make us go toward the petty path of self-pity. It’s high time we take onus of our body.
Let’s start by acknowledging the difference between the “what we actually are” and “what we are called by others”. After that, let’s stop comparing ourselves with others because only then when we will be able to realize that someone who we think looks better than us, is only “different” from us. If that doesn’t work, just remember one thing, despite how open and loving you attempt to be, people can only meet you, as deeply as they’ve met themselves. So, if somebody teases you the next time to put you in that self -loathing state, just remember that.
2) Parental Pressure
The problem of parental pressure especially with regards to academics is more common than the instances of people coping from it. Sad, isn’t it? The pressure of making parents satisfied is released majorly in forms of mental ailment that could affect a child’s entire life.
Hence, it is necessary that not just the students but also their parents are to be counseled by somebody who is a professional. But, if you are old enough to understand things, I request you to speak up. Not speaking will only make your situation worse. Speaking does not mean openly disregarding your parents but it means that communicating your perspectives so that a mutually acceptable conclusion can be arrived upon. Also, make sure that your development in the field of your choice is evident to your parents so that they trust you when you say you are sure about your decision.
3) Crushes and infatuations
Having a crush over someone in school life is a part that adds a pleasant and a fun element to it. We all love to love and be loved by someone. The chase until one of us confesses his/her feelings still continues to remain our favorite part. However, at the same time, let’s not forget how important it is to realize the difference between crushing over someone and obsessing over someone.
When we begin to like somebody in a romantic way, we tend to attribute them characteristics that we would like to see in them. The point we often miss is that, they might not be like that in real. We unknowingly start depending on them for our happiness. And if they don’t do something according to our expectations (let’s say, recognize us), we feel offended and try to release that anger by hurting ourselves.
The point is that most of the times, the other person is unaware of our feelings. If our feelings aren’t reciprocated, let’s take a moment to remind ourselves that we deserve better and that self- love is more important than receiving love from others. And if things go south after having a relationship with them, let’s thank them for helping us see what we truly want and don’t want in our lives. Remember, We Are Evolving.
4) Academic Pressure
It is genuinely saddening to hear about students committing suicides all over the country because they can’t cope up with their academic pressure put by schools and coaching centers. From the finest of the brains working inside us, it is disheartening to learn that the only parameter of success was, is and will always be marks. We honestly don’t know how long will it take for people to understand that few scores printed on a sheet of paper don’t help us inside that interview room. What matters is our presence of mind, our values and awareness of self as well as the surrounding because employers believe what they see in front of them and it is certainly not the scores.
Hence, start working toward your all round development. Read books of different genres, explore music of different styles. Try to learn from as many sources as you can. Engage in situations that encourage you to come out of your comfort zone and think creatively. Build your talent and be better at it with time. And while you do that, breathe.
5) Social Media Influences
Social media these days allows students to make up for their real life “shortcomings” on the web. While some use it to express themselves fully (ex- introverts writing blogs), others use it as their response to peer influence in school. The power that we have given to social media today can either make or break us, to which school children are most susceptible. Hence, it is important for them to realize that if they use social media for seeking recognition, their efforts might just go in vain. Because by being someone you aren’t, you will only get recognition from those who they are not. What is the point of having somebody look for you, only virtually? What is the point of having 600 friends and 1000 likes on Facebook when even of them doesn’t talk to you or know you in real? Lastly, what is the point of being a slave to what we created? Most of us will probably not understand what that means until life makes us.
Hence, each stressor presented here if looked at from a positive perspective, can act like a boon to our growth. After all, the first thing caterpillars do in their cocoons is shed their skin , looking like a puddle of glop only to turn into a delicate winged beautiful creature that we know as a butterfly.
So Keep Blooming.